Kiss Me, I'm Pretending I'm Irish

Dipsy on his 8th green beer.Dipsy here. Coming to you live from the bathroom floor. Hungover... again. Listen, it's not my fault. Life just keeps handing me excuses to get polluted. First it was Spring Break, then it was a Monday (that's still an excuse to drink right?), then St. Patrick's Day.

You want to know what happens to a little green Teletubby after a night full of green beer, Irish whiskey, Irish car bombs, and midgets dressed like leprechauns? The same exact thing that happens to everyone else... I ate some Taco Bell, I may or may not have slept with a "little person", and I spent the last 8 and a half hours puking up a hideous mix of 7 layer burrito and green booze.

I think I was supposed to meet with my agent today about some auditions for commercials or something. Oh well - looks like Dipsy won't be the new posterchild for adult diapers or some new herpes medication or something. Hey, maybe if I keep up all this drinking and self destructive behavior I can get on one of those celebrity rehab shows. Whatever it takes to get back on TV.

Well I've got a toilet bowl and some Pedialyte screamin' my name. Remember today's lesson kids: if you can't get on television for the right reasons, drink a lot and get on for the wrong reasons.... oh and the 7 layer burrito is never as good of an idea as you think it is.

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